Womanhood and Feminism Your Way

Nowadays it seems like everywhere you look someone has a very strong opinion about anything and everything…am I right? (JK, people have always had opinions, now we just have this weird platforms where we have hundreds of followers via the interwebs to listen to us. This is so cool but I think sometimes it can be destructive in a lot of ways.)

We get the news in real time, all around the world, whenever we want to access it. We get live streams of protests. We see speeches, Ted Talks, Pinterest articles, and webinars chalk full of information and resources. We see SO much political stuff all over Facebook and the news…newscasters debating and yelling at each other, people spewing hateful comments about their opponents or other’s “wrong” political views.

Guys, if people in the olden days could see how much we have access to…their mind would be blown! We literally have the world at the tips of our fingers, and a platform like never before.

Wanna know what has been standing out to me most lately?

I see a LOT of mom articles on the internet talking about what is best for our children: Breast vs. bottle… Daycare or early preschool… Working mom vs. working stay at home mom…

Co sleeping vs. crib sleeping.

I also see a lot of articles talking about empowered women taking charge of their lives and family and career… and how women should believe this and stand up and fight for this and be on this side of the argument or debate, because it’s the ‘right’ thing to do and now is the time to do it!

Historically speaking, women now have more of a voice than ever. Which is awesome and really great in a lot of ways…God Bless America, am I right!? So why would a platform be destructive? Isn’t ‘feminism’ all about women having just as much of a voice as everyone else on the planet?

Yes it is. But guess what? You don’t have to agree, listen to, or even read someone else’s opinion about womanhood or motherhood or feminism or political views or whatever else! Because sometimes, we get so entrenched in following popular influencers, celebrities, blogs, or pages, that we start to feel less than and start second guessing our own beliefs and capabilities. We start to diminish ourselves. I realized this when I started feeling ashamed for some ‘old fashioned’ views I held dear to my heart after being entrenched in intense subjects on social media. I started wondering why I felt that way, and if my views were all of a sudden “wrong” as a 21st century gal. So when does being open-minded to new ideas become potentially harmful?

The destructiveness I’m talking about happens very subtly. I’m talking about when we truly to second guess ourselves due to others loud powerfully broadcast opinions, that demean other’s core beliefs in a roundabout way. It is very sneaky. It can unconsciously whisper to us “You’re doing this wrong. You’re not a good mom. If you believed this, then you’d be on the right side of the argument. Why would you think that way is the right way? Go ahead and mess up your kid!”

For example… this was my thought process, researching everything I could while pregnant: “Well wait a minute. This mom said that formula babies will be more susceptible to colds in the future…Wait.. if I sleep train, my kid will really have attachment issues? Wait a minute..do vaccines really cause all those things!? I am so not ready to be a mom. SHOOT, WHAT AM I EVEN DOING!?”

So Mamas, I’m here to tell you what I’ve learned. You can take it or leave it, because that is the point of this whole blog post! 😉

You know in your heart what you believe and who you are, and what is right for you and your family. You are a capable woman, because you ARE a woman. You know what is best for your baby. You created actual life inside you. You grew an extra skeleton, heart, and brain for crying out loud…that’s pretty powerful! Don’t you think that our motherly instincts get stifled sometimes with the onslaught of opinionated information and fads that float around? There is not a right or wrong way to be a woman. That’s the beautiful thing: as a woman, we can be whatever we want to be. There is no right or wrong way to nourish your child. There is no right or wrong belief about a woman’s purpose. Use your voice to make a bold statement, or sit back and spectate. There is no right or wrong view point as a 21st century gal.

Embracing womanhood and feminism means you can find joy in being a working stay at home mom and believe that that is where you belong. It also means that you can find joy in being a working mom with an outside career and believe that that is where you belong. It means that you can feel confident in your parenting practices, and it also means you can be open to learning new techniques. It means you can be a Republican or a Democrat or a 3rd party or nothing at all! Womanhood is personal, and it’s all up to you. Don’t let others tear down what you believe is best for you.

It’s awesome because being a ‘feminist’ really means celebrating womanhood however YOU choose. And that is incredible.

-Nicole L.

{Nicole is a beautiful wife to the man of her dreams and mama to a little girl named Lucy. She runs a boutique named after her since quitting her job as a children’s social worker specializing in abuse relating to trauma. She has such a beautiful outlook on motherhood and loves sharing the ups and downs that come with it all.}