Intentional Time

I remember all the feelings that washed over me when I found out I was pregnant with my second babe. There were feelings of excitement, of gratitude, of joy, and, surprisingly, feelings of fear. I had spent the last two years showering our oldest with attention, and I was so worried that he was going to feel replaced or less loved when this new baby made his arrival. I also worried that I wasn’t going to have that special one-on-one time with the new little one the way I did with our first.

Well, here we are 3 years later. I have found that the dynamic of our family has changed, but it was all for good. Our house is overflowing with more love and laughter (and mess) than ever before, and it is so good.

However, I do still feel that it is important for my kiddos to get some one-on-one time. It doesn’t have to be complicated or big. I find that my boys think any unshared attention is special.

Sometimes, I just utilize the time they naturally have me to themselves. My oldest, Rowan, is now in preschool, so I spend my mornings snuggling Crew, reading books to him, and playing tractors…all things that he loves. Crew goes down for a nap shortly after Rowan gets home from school, so we spend that time playing his favorite board game or working on a messy art project. Every day does not look like this…there is obviously housework to be done, but it is okay to put off dishes to spend some time painting dinosaurs or reading books.

Now that Rowan is a little older, we do make time to do some little one-on-one dates every now and then.  Saturday mornings are great for a little coffee/breakfast date, because Crew can tag along with Daddy to do the farm chores…which he loves!

If you have more than one kiddo and you feel like you they aren’t getting enough one-on-one time, just know that they probably don’t notice it as much as you do. In fact, during most of my one-on-one dates with Rowan, he tells me repeatedly that he wishes bubba was with us. They love to be together, and there is nothing wrong with that. If you do want to make more time with your kids individually, here is my advice. Don’t stress over it. Simply coloring with your kiddo while you chat about their day will give them that attention. It doesn’t have to be fancy or planned out.

You are doing a good job, mamas!

Brittney Fletcher is a small town girl married to her high school sweetheart and best friend. They have two sweet little boys and are currently in the process of becoming foster parents. When she’s not chasing toddlers, she can be found taking pictures or decorating. She recently became a stay-at-home mom and is soaking up every messy moment of it. She loves adventures with her family…even if they are simply to the farm to feed the cows. She is thrilled to share a bit of her heart here on The Mamahood, a community that has richly blessed her!