Why are those two words some of the hardest words to say? I take that back. Maybe those words are somewhat easy to say, but do we really mean it when we say it? Or do we just say it so we can say that we said it? I’ve learned a few things about forgiveness, at least, from my personal experience with it.
1. Sometimes it takes time, and that’s OK. Don’t put a rush on forgiving someone. Take
the time you need to be able to truly and fully forgive the person. 2. Forgiveness requires drawing upon the power of The Atonement of Jesus Christ
3. You have to be able to forgive yourself. 4. When you feel like you have genuinely forgiven the person and yourself you need to let
Taking the time we need to forgive someone is critical. I remember when I was knee deep in trying to forgive someone I felt awful. I was upset and frustrated and slightly hurt, but at the same time I felt like I was not being a very Christlike person by having all these negative feelings. So I would try and just tell myself I forgave the person and move on, but it wasn’t working. I just felt worse and worse for a longer period of time. So I think actually taking the time to work through what we are feeling, and recognizing that things take time and don’t always happen overnight, will help us really break things down, dig deep and fully forgive. We shouldn’t feel like somebody Christ is ashamed of just because of the feelings we are feeling. We should realize that He is probably very proud of us for wanting to work so diligently in forgiving.
I personally believe that Jesus Christ died for us. He suffered for all of our sins and sorrows. And because of this we can be forgiven; He has already paid that price. In my experience Christ’s sacrifice and His love allowed me to fully forgive both myself and the other person. It truly is a beautiful thing to experience.
Forgiving ourselves might just be the hardest part of the whole thing. We HAVE to be able to forgive ourselves for holding the grudge, and maybe even, how we treated the other person while trying to forgive them. Or even our thoughts towards that person as we were trying to forgive them. If we don’t forgive ourselves we can never truly move on.
Lastly, we need to let it go. We might remember what happened and how we felt. We might be tempted to bring up those negative feelings in the future. We can’t. The past is the past. If we have gone through the process of forgiveness then we need to just let it go. We all make mistakes. We can’t go back and change what happened, but once we forgive we need to go forward and move on. If we can do that then there’s a chance for a beautiful new relationship to be had.
Forgiveness can be tough, but a life lived with underlined anger and resentment towards anybody in our lives is ultimately hurting us. Sometimes it is hurting the other person, but it is always going to affect us. And from experience, happiness can’t present itself in its purest and fullest form, in a relationship, if there is tension, for whatever reason. Happy relationships require people who genuinely love and care for each other.
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