Embracing New Beginnings

Ready or not, January is here. And that means a lot more than just a new season of The Bachelor. In fact, I’m going to take a wild guess and say that you’ve heard the word “resolution“ 492 times in the last five days. You log on insta? Oh, wow, look at that, Sadie lost 14 pounds, and you’re eating your third sleeve of Ritz crackers. It’s fine.

Luckily for us mamas, New Years doesn’t have to be focused solely on resolutions. (Or Sadie for that matter.) There is a lot of new in the new year, and I’m not just talking about that cute calendar you found in the Target dollar spot.

I’d be lying if I said that the daunting thought of a new year didn’t produce anxiety for me, especially when the beginning of the year is matched with other prominent changes in life.

Resolutions are hard. But change is harder! I write that as I sit in the apartment I’ve been living in for one day. ONE DAY. How’s that for change?
If you ever want to feel totally overwhelmed and full of sudden emotion, move into a new apartment right before the holidays. (Can I publicly apologize to my husband here?)
It was rough- not just because we had to watch Facebook marketplace vigilantly for empty boxes (although, that was the worst.). It was rough because I felt an emptiness. I felt it the second we packed our first box.

It’s then that I realized change feels empty.

Why doesn’t anyone talk about the harsh unfamiliarity of going through something new? I was overcome with that sinking empty feeling as soon as we arrived at our new apartment and began to unpack. Moving all our junk out of the apartment was no fun, but it paled in comparison to the void and the lump in my throat that seemed constant ever since we arrived.

In a quiet moment, after the U-haul drove away and my husband and I were knee-deep in boxes, I looked at my husband and confessed, “It made me really sad to see the apartment so empty.” My eyes welled up a little as I said it. He stopped what he was doing and sympathetically said “Briana, you’re right- it’s sad it’s empty.” He then looked me in the eyes and said, “but this apartment is full.”

Aww.

We had warranted every right to feel empty from this change. It was a big one. No one would have judged me if I wallowed. I would have normally thrown myself a pity party and probably cried for a little while- okay a LONG while. But, this change was different. The words my husband uttered rang true. I realized that there were far better blessings from making the
decision to move, than any that our old apartment could have offered us.

Our apartment was full. And most importantly, our hearts were full.
Was the change hard anyway? Heck yes it was. Do I still get frustrated every time I accidentally turn on the garbage disposal instead of the kitchen light? Also, yes. BUT, instead of getting stressed with the differences between then and now, I have made the decision to consciously choose to embrace that change means the start of something new (cue Troy and Gabriella.)

You can feel full.

Some of you are probably wondering okay yeah that sounds great but come on, it’s a lot easier said than done!

Girl, you’re not wrong. I’ve been there. Psh, sometimes I’m still there. However, mindfulness is key. Tell yourself that every ending is a new beginning. It sounds hippie dippie, I know. But soon you’ll start believing it. Ask your friends to help. Be honest with how you’re really feeling. Accept
it, acknowledge it and know that opportunity comes from change; and more importantly, progress comes from change.

So, whether you have just moved into a new apartment, replaced most of your free time with pumping sessions, or your bff coworker just quit her job- know that every ending is a new beginning. If you’re mourning your old life, give yourself grace. It’s hard. Know you have mamas who’ve walked that road before.

I have found peace in the quote by Craig Lounsbrough: “A
sunset is nothing more and nothing less than the backside of a sunrise.” Your sunsets can seem daunting. They did to me. Find your people that will support you through the hard times, seek help from them and others, and work tirelessly at keeping your mindset positive. Why? Because this January holds the prettiest sunrise. For you, and for me.

So here’s to embracing new beginnings (and endings!) You got this, Mama.