#MondayMama: To the Working Mama

September 22, 2014 in Love Notes

Yay, it’s that day of week again! I’ve decided to chop off the name “Monday Mama Moments” to just “Monday Mama’s” and spotlight our Mama’s from The Mamahood group on Facebook. (Join HERE)

Today’s Monday Mama is cute Brynn. She has been a member of the group from the very beginning and had her little nugget in May. She is 24 years old from Salt Lake City, UT and has a darling daughter named Nova who is 4 months and sweet husband Jordan. They’ve been married for 5 years now and even though they waited awhile to start a family, she wouldn’t have had it any other way.

Aren’t these two so beautiful!? (I’m secretly dying over her leggings and moccs!)

Here’s her story:

“So far my transition into motherhood has been pretty smooth (knock on wood). My pregnancy and delivery were both normal (I almost said easy, but anyone who says pregnancy is easy is a liar, and we all know it) and I’d like to say for now I have this whole thing down (Ha! Just kidding). There is one thing that hasn’t been the easiest transition for me though, and that has been working. Now let me preface with this. I love my job. Can I say it again? I LOVE my job. I’m a (newly) registered nurse and I worked hard to get my job in the newborn nursery and NICU. I also love my kid. Do I need to say that again too? I LOVE MY KID. I also worked hard to have a kid. See where there’s an issue?

For most of my life I’ve been taught and told that a mother’s role is in the home. Now I’m not a traditional girl, and I never really aspired to be a mom. Is that bad to say? Because if it is I’m sorry, but it’s the truth. You know those girls that said “I want to be a mom when I grow up and have 10-20 kids and cook dinner for them, and sew all their clothes, and be awesome.” That wasn’t me. Not that any of those things are bad to want in life. In all honesty had I known what being a mom was like, I probably would have wanted the same thing. I now know that being a mom is amazing, but kids were the furthest thing from my mind when I thought of my future. For me I had always wanted to be a nurse. It was always something that was in the back of my mind, and when the opportunity arose to take a CNA course in high school, I jumped on it, I excelled at it, and I knew I wanted to go further. When I was 18 and fresh out of high school I got a CNA job on the mom/baby unit at the hospital. For 6 years I worked there learning, taking pre-reqs for nursing school, and eventually getting in and finishing nursing school this past May. If you were paying attention you will realize I had my baby in May as well right? Nova was a pleasant but unplanned surprise for us 9 months almost to the date I was to graduate nursing school. I’m not going to sugar coat it and say I wasn’t upset. I cried when those two pink lines showed up. I bawled because I was equal parts happy and terrified at the same time. How was I supposed to finish the hardest thing I’ve ever done and do it pregnant? What will people think?How will I stay on my feet during 12-13 hour clinicals and work 12 hour shifts? And the biggest question of all, how will I start two brand new jobs… being a mom and being a nurse at the same exact time?

Here’s the dilemma I faced. I had worked for YEARS to become a registered nurse. I had a plan, and that plan was to have kids after I had settled into a job as a nurse. Maybe work a little full time to get used to it, and then cut down my hours so I can stay home with my kid. That’s what moms are supposed to do right? Be home with their kids so daycare, grandparents, etc aren’t raising them. But we all know that life doesn’t happen according to plan. Babies don’t follow plans. Sometimes plans have to change. To be honest it still hurts a little bit when I read things on Facebook/internet along the lines of “I love being able to stay home with my kids, I love being able to be there for their first moments, I love bewing able to just be a mom and not worry about leaving them for work.” The Instagram pictures of kids at the park, the aquarium, or even the Del Taco play place during work hours stings a little bit. The well-meaning comments from people that say “Oh that must be so hard to leave your baby” Or “I don’t know how you do that, I would die if I had to go to work and leave my littles.” The little mom guilt voice in the back of my head makes me feel sad for having to leave my baby home while I go to work. Makes me feel guilty for loving my job so much. Why do we do these things to ourselves? Why as mothers do we feel horrible about ourselves if we have a title anything other than mom? I’d LOVE to stay home with my baby 24/7, and I applaud and am jealous of all the mothers who do because it’s definitely harder than my day job, but I also love being a nurse. I love stepping in and taking care of those sweet sick babies in the NICU when their mamas can’t take them home quite yet, or are too exhausted to be in the hospital another minute. I love going and helping other woman do the single most amazing thing a woman can do, give birth. I love being one of the first people to hear those sweet new cries as a new little person enters this earth. I love making sure that sweet baby is doing well after birth, and wrapping and handling him to the eager arms of a new father. I also love coming home and pulling my beautiful girl into bed to cuddle after a long night at work. I love those days off when we giggle and play all day and wait until dad gets home. I love knowing that my time with her is limited and precious until I go in for my next shift, so we go out and explore this world together, both of us having new eyes to everything around us.

So I guess what I have to say is…to the working mother, don’t let that nagging voice in the back of your head get to you. If you work because you love it, because you have to, you are in school, or any of those things lie ahead in your future, know that you are still an amazing mother. Know that you can do hard things. Know that for whatever reason this is your plan for now. So whether you stay home with your kids or you are a working mother, we are all in this together. We are all amazing. And working or staying at home we are The Mamahood.

If you’re curious to know more about our life feel free to visit our blog here (like that tasteful plug?) and thanks for reading!”

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  • a s h l e y b o y e r September 22, 2014 at 4:50 pm

    I think you're a great mama! Honestly, I think that some of us are better moms for having careers and other things to offer the world. Not to minimize the impact and hard work of a full-time, SAHM, but honestly, when we have time with our little ones, we enjoy them and love them! Your time with her IS precious 🙂 I know for me (it's a bit different) when I spend 24/7 with my little guy, it makes me a little crazy. I love him, but I also love doing things that are for me and help me feel fulfilled, too. Does that make sense? I think you're doing a great job of balancing both and you shouldn't feel ashamed EVER for loving your job.

  • a s h l e y b o y e r September 22, 2014 at 4:50 pm

    I think you're a great mama! Honestly, I think that some of us are better moms for having careers and other things to offer the world. Not to minimize the impact and hard work of a full-time, SAHM, but honestly, when we have time with our little ones, we enjoy them and love them! Your time with her IS precious 🙂 I know for me (it's a bit different) when I spend 24/7 with my little guy, it makes me a little crazy. I love him, but I also love doing things that are for me and help me feel fulfilled, too. Does that make sense? I think you're doing a great job of balancing both and you shouldn't feel ashamed EVER for loving your job.

  • a s h l e y b o y e r September 22, 2014 at 4:50 pm

    I think you're a great mama! Honestly, I think that some of us are better moms for having careers and other things to offer the world. Not to minimize the impact and hard work of a full-time, SAHM, but honestly, when we have time with our little ones, we enjoy them and love them! Your time with her IS precious 🙂 I know for me (it's a bit different) when I spend 24/7 with my little guy, it makes me a little crazy. I love him, but I also love doing things that are for me and help me feel fulfilled, too. Does that make sense? I think you're doing a great job of balancing both and you shouldn't feel ashamed EVER for loving your job.

  • Bethani Gregg September 22, 2014 at 4:51 pm

    i agree – dont let guilt make you stay home.. do what you love… me personally i love being able to be at home with my son everyday, but if i had a job that i absolutely loved & couldn't do without, theres always a way to have the best of both worlds. 🙂

  • Dallas Socials September 22, 2014 at 4:55 pm

    Do what is right for you and your family and don't let anything else get in the way.

  • Unknown September 22, 2014 at 5:03 pm

    Best wishes!

  • Camille Millecam Whiting September 22, 2014 at 6:48 pm

    What a great post, and great perspective! It's such an individual decision for all, and I applaud those who find their path and follow it!

  • Melissa Haag September 22, 2014 at 7:02 pm

    Nova is such a beautiful name! My daughter was an unplanned surprise, and I worked a LOT when she was little. (I'm a hairstylist) She is 13 now and I am self-employed, and able to work about 20 hours per week. That wouldn't be possible without the hard work I put in years ago. There is not 1 cookie-cutter experience that fits all for moms!

  • Jenna Brussee September 22, 2014 at 8:00 pm

    This is my first time reading this series, and I love it! What a great way to highlight some awesome Mamas.

  • Erica Bodker September 22, 2014 at 10:39 pm

    What a great post and awesome mom you are. Thank you so much for sharing with us.

  • spiffykerms September 22, 2014 at 10:41 pm

    Omg Momma and Baby are so stylish, and I love her baby's name – Nova! Haven't heard of it before. Thanks to her for sharing her honest thoughts about motherhood.

  • Angelic Sinova September 23, 2014 at 12:20 am

    What a great series! I love seeing so many inspiring woman/mama's all in one place <3

  • Alisha H. September 23, 2014 at 12:28 am

    The only time I've heard the name Nova was my college computer teacher. Her name was Nova. I like that name.

  • Andi September 23, 2014 at 2:12 am

    I think working outside the home, especially as a nurse makes you super well-rounded and an awesome mom, you are a role-model!

  • M. Mobery September 23, 2014 at 5:34 am

    Do what feels right for you. What is good for some, is toxic for others. Regardless of your choice you are a fantastic mom.

  • Trish September 23, 2014 at 6:33 am

    I think moms just have to own their decisions and not let other people get in their heads. It's the only way to live your life and live it happily!

  • Neely September 23, 2014 at 4:00 pm

    This is such a great post! I will be sending this to my best friend!

  • Brooklyn Jolley September 23, 2014 at 4:04 pm

    Those moccassins are seriously the best. <3

  • celery and cupcakes September 23, 2014 at 4:22 pm

    This is something that will be effecting me when my baby arrives. In the end you have to do what's best for you and your family.

  • Kendall Rayburn September 23, 2014 at 6:19 pm

    You just have to follow your heart when it comes to motherhood – that momma instinct is there for a reason 😉

  • Alyssa September 23, 2014 at 6:20 pm

    SOOOO much props to moms who work/go to school. I know when I was working all I would want to do after a long day is come home and veg out… I cannot imagine all the hard work that comes from this!

  • Miranda Myrabev September 23, 2014 at 7:40 pm

    do what is right for your because only then would you be good for your baby and husband. happy mummy = happy house hold am told

  • Carly September 23, 2014 at 9:03 pm

    Brynn is way too cute! And I totally want those moccasins, too!

  • Jenn @ hellorigby! September 23, 2014 at 9:15 pm

    What a great post, so glad you're doing what works for you!

  • Jessica Doll @ Team Wiking September 23, 2014 at 10:26 pm

    This is a great story, and a good lesson for all working mama's to remember.

  • Michelle Chouinard September 23, 2014 at 10:37 pm

    It's crazy to me that we as women are so tortured no matter which choice we make. Stay-at-home moms feel guilty for not working. Working moms feel guilty for not staying at home. Women who choose not to have children at all feel like they're missing something crucial. We need to all give each other, and ourselves, to make our own choices and live them joyfully! 🙂

  • Ecuador InMyEyes September 24, 2014 at 1:58 am

    What a cute picture! and such a great way to get to know another mom 🙂

  • Rebekah Clarke September 24, 2014 at 2:31 pm

    Thank you for sharing your story Brynn! Mama guilt has gotten to me over the past month returning back to work and this really helped ♥

  • Amby Felix September 24, 2014 at 7:12 pm

    What a great story and great idea for a post! 🙂 I think this will be very beneficial to many mommies out there!

  • Jordan Wise September 24, 2014 at 7:51 pm

    Super cute, love the idea of this post!

  • Ayana Pitterson September 24, 2014 at 8:42 pm

    Great post! I completely understand your point about mama guilt. I have learned to live with it and say that I give something different to my kids that a SAHM doesn't and vice versa. Great article.

    Thrifting Diva
    http://www.thriftingdiva.com

  • Raewyn @ Be A Warrior Queen September 25, 2014 at 6:46 pm

    I love this! It is seriously so motivational. I think many women have the same conflict – I have always wanted to be a mom but also I have always wanted to have my job. I love my job and it would be so hard for me to keep it if I were to have a baby soon (well, maybe not my boss is flexible) but I work with a 50 mile commute to LA. That means I wake up and leave before 5am and get home around 5 pm. That is so long to be away from a baby (though as a nurse, I'm sure that is your normal shift). My husband and I aren't currently preventing pregnancy but we aren't planning it either. It excites me and makes me so nervous! Thank you for sharing this perspective with me!!

  • Les September 25, 2014 at 9:45 pm

    I totally get it- I love my job too, but I hate missing out on all of the sweet “firsts” that some random babysitters get to experience (but they probably won't even notice because they're busy holding other babies). It's hard being a mom. I'm with you!

  • Sarah Woods September 29, 2014 at 1:31 pm

    I totally related to this. Being a working mom is hard, really hard. Especially in the blogging world where everyone seems to be a SAHM.

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