When my man Monty was born The Pal was able to stay home with us for a week. It was magical and glorious. Then, one day he decided that he should probably go back work so we don’t starve. The day he went back to work will go down as the day I realized I was really a mom.
It was also the day I realized it really does take a village to raise a baby.
Dane left the house for work and not five minutes after he walked out the door Monty decided it would be funny to pee all over me. So I went and drew his bath. (This was back when I thought you gave the baby a bath and changed your and their clothes everytime you got peed on. Turns out I can wear a peed on shirt for three days in a row now!)
Monty’s bath was drawn and he was stark naked, as I immersed him in the water I got the sudden realization that I was going to either throw up or lose it out the other end. I quickly pulled monty out of the tub and ran to the other bathroom. Why I ran to the other bathroom I still to this day can not tell you. I set monty down in his bouncer naked as he came into this world and I “gracefully” sat down on the toilet. Just as I sat down, Monty had an explosion happen in his pants. Had he been wearing pants I probably wouldn’t have made this next mistake. I couldn’t just have him sitting in his own poo so I picked him up, poopy bum in my hand.
Then the wailing started.
I couldn’t just get off the toilet, and I wasn’t near a sucker so I shoved him on the boob. All at once I realized everything that was happening and I lost it. “Is this motherhood?”
At that moment, I remembered the words of my amazing friend Andrea, ” if you ever need anything, and I mean anything, you can call me.” Sucker.
I called her and just said, “come get him.” I imagine by how quickly I heard her walk into my house that she was quite worried.
She hollered out and I called her back to my bathroom. There I sat crying, pee on my shirt, pants down, sitting on the toilet and a naked baby with a poo bottom on the boob.
She went into superwoman mode taking Monty out of my arms and whisking him to the other room. She wiped him down, dressed him and calmed him down. She told me to take all the time I needed. She didn’t think twice about all the millions of things she needed to be doing, she was just there for me in my moment.
Now you might wonder, why in the world I would ever tell anyone this story because lets be honest, It’s mildly humiliating. Partly it’s because I don’t have a filter. That’s an ongoing issue.
Mostly I just truly believe we are meant to be supported by others. One of the most important things that helped me stay positive post-baby was surrounding myself with a strong community of people who wanted me to be happy and succeed. If you try to do it alone, you will likely struggle and probably be stuck on the toilet for a lot longer.