Today’s Monday Mama is the beautiful Michelle. She is from Sandy and is living in Provo, Utah. She studied advertising at Brigham Young University and is currently an amazing piano/voice teacher and the best mama to her sweet boy. She is the cutest girl from the inside out!
Here’s her story:
From the beginning of this pregnancy, everyone would tell me, it’s all worth it. It was so hard to convince myself it would be. Many of you know that I was sick until about weeks 23-24. I was throwing up a lot, getting IV fluids constantly, trying to take my prenatal every night without throwing it up, etc. After that, I felt fine as long as I was eating a snack. Everything seemed normal with the baby at our anatomy scan, his head was down, he looked great!
Then, the third trimester started. No one told me about the uncomfortableness I would feel during this time. My hips hurt. My sciatic nerve would hurt occasionally. My bladder was getting, what I thought, punched at all the time. I was going to the bathroom constantly. My feet swelled up no matter how much water I drank. Every pregnancy “con” I experienced during pregnancy.
It wasn’t until Sunday, August 25th, that our little man gave us a little scare. I started bleeding a little bit and that whole weekend was experiencing some back pain. By Sunday, the back pain felt worse. With the small, yet constant bleeding, and the back pain, I had a feeling to get checked out. We went to labor and delivery, I got hooked up on monitors and was apparently having contractions. I couldn’t feel the contractions at all. I was also dilated to a one. We also found out that our little boy was breech. The nurses and midwife gave me some medicine to stop the contractions and I was sent home to be on bed rest. It wasn’t strict bed rest, but I was ordered to take it very easy.
On Tuesday, August 26th, I went in to my check up. I learned at this appointment that because of my partial bicornuate uterus, I couldn’t have an inversion to have the doctors try to flip the baby. It would be too dangerous for them to try it as my uterus could tear during the process. So, we scheduled a C-Section for September 15th. My goal was to take it easy so baby boy could stay in until that time. I followed the instructions and took it really easy. And, I also started preparing myself emotionally for this surgery.
We were (and still are) taking a hypnobirthing class to learn breathing and visualization techniques to get me through a natural vaginal labor. I always expected to have perfect births. For Derek to be right by my side, holding my hand through it all, or whisking my arm with his fingers while I mentally push through contractions.
The next few days, baby boy was kicking me very hard in my bladder. It was so hard that I would wake up in the middle of the night because it hurt. On Thursday, August 28th at about 1:00 AM, I woke up to him kicking. As I was laying in bed, I felt him kick me really hard and my water broke. I knew it wasn’t urine because I couldn’t control the gush. I woke up Derek and I walked briskly into the bathroom. Sitting on the toilet, I kept thinking, this is it. We are going to have a baby today and I’M NOT READY. I hadn’t had time to prepare myself for this. The baby’s room wasn’t even fully organized or ready. It was too early.
We got in the car, drove to the hospital, and the calling of the parents began. I tried over and over and over again to call my parents and let them know my water broke and we were having the baby. They didn’t pick up their phones. I called Derek’s mom, and both her and Dad Nielsen had just taken sleeping pills. They couldn’t drive from Ephriam to meet us at the hospital.
Because of my scoliosis, I have 15 vertebrae fused, I knew that an epidural or spinal might not work. I was probably going to be put under generally and not be awake for the birth of our son for the surgery. I wanted so badly for my mom to be there, for anyone to be there with me when I woke up from surgery. I told Derek no matter what, you go with the baby and hold him so you can bond with him.
I finally, after trying to reach my parents so many times, got a hold of my little brother, Nate. He lives close to the hospital and came right over to give me a blessing with Derek. There was only like a 10 minute span where they could do a blessing since the prep for the C-Section was going so fast. After the blessing, I had a thought to call my parents next door neighbor to go wake them up. She answered the phone and was able to knock on their door and wake them up. They got there after the baby was born, but before I woke up.
Derek came with me to the operating room and the anesthesiologist tried doing a spinal. I sat on the edge of the operating table and was shaking because I was nervous. I put my head on Derek’s chest and held his hands, due to nerve damage from previous back surgeries, I didn’t even feel the prick of the needle. It’s sad that I get more nervous for the needles than actual surgeries. Sadly, the spinal didn’t work and while got moved to the operating table, I had to watch my husband bravely walk away, holding the I love you sign with his fingers, and tears in his eyes.
The anesthesiologist put oxygen over my mouth and I started hyperventilating. I was scared. It wasn’t just me having to go through the surgery, it was the baby as well. I would be put all the way under, having no control of the situation. I then started doing my calm breathing, that I learned in hypnobirthing, and I felt the presence of my grandfather (whom our little boy is named after) and my great grandmother around me. I knew they were watching out for me and little boy.
When I awoke from surgery about an hour or so later, my little brother Nate was right next to me to feed me ice chips. My parents got to the hospital about 30 minutes after the baby was born. They showed me pictures of him, though I was still a little out of it. I remember Derek coming in the room and warning me of the IV’s in our baby. He had low blood sugar and needed a little boost-this is very common in late pre-term babies.
Then, the miracle happened. Our little son was brought into the room, IV and all. I held him for the first time on my chest and everything miserable about pregnancy and everything difficult about how I gave birth went completely away. The morning sickness I encompassed during the first 20 weeks or so, the discomfort in my hips in the third trimester, the no sleep factor with getting up to use the bathroom in the last weeks of the pregnancy…it was all worth it.
No matter what way babies come into your family (IVF, adoption, C-section, Natural, etc.). No matter how hard it may seem to get them here, it is all worth it to hold that little baby in your arms the first time and staring into their eyes. I thought I knew what love is, but it’s so much more. I’m so glad that my birth went well. It wasn’t was I expected and I didn’t give birth how I wanted to, but I did get the most perfect son. We love him so much.
Meet Dexter Ronald Nielsen. Dexter is a mix between Derek and Derek’s father, Rex. Ronald is after my Mom’s dad who passed away a few years ago. He was 6 pounds 14 ounces and 17 inches long. We are smitten and in love as every parent should be over their children. (And we are exhausted too.)